"Calm out side, Disparate inside"

August 14, 2019

 


I might look calm outside, but inside, I am struggling. 
This struggle was one of the reasons I have decided to start this blog.

 

I couldn't stay in Japan any longer, I lived in Japan for 16 years of my life, and I needed to break away from everything. Since when I was young, I never liked being comfortable. When my life gets comfortable and steady, I create trouble. I am very self-destructive.
I wanted to create my own new life somewhere else. Somewhere new that no one knows me. I can be blank, and I can create who I want to be!

I became new Daisuke in the U.K. I have started something new at the new place, Ballet in The U.K. 
Even when I managed to join in vocational ballet school after I had no ballet experience of the age of 17 years old, I did not feel....right. I did not feel like I belonged there. I knew something much, much more significant was waiting for me. I was sensing the future, so I was feeling frustrated at the school.
However, after many years, I have managed to achieve everything I wished and more, yet...

I am not exactly sure what it is, but I feel this" frustration", again! I can feel that I was born to do more than what I do now. 
 I think I am good at what I do. Yes, I can do it even better, so, I am making an effort to take courses and more qualifications to better my self and deepen the knowledge. However...

I was born, and I was born to bring prosperity to many, many people. I was born to make people happy, inspired and excited.

Today, I had an informal lunch with my friend. And, after lunch, my friend invited me ( I asked my self) to his office and introduced me to his college. 
My friend does not even do ballet either interested in ballet, but he thinks my philosophy in life, which build based on ballet experience is incredibly exciting and inspiring. He gave me his friend's contact, and he told me that his friend could help me.
I want to make a difference in people's life. However, to be able to do that, first, I must make a difference in my life. So, I am actively going to meet new people and challenge new things. It works or not, either succeed or fail; I can not think that ahead. I can only focus on what I have giving and go forward.

In the next two years time, when I read back this blog, I will think that this was the life-changing moment as every day bring a life-changing possibility. 
It is up to me, take it and fly or ignore and stay the same.

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